Live With It

She wants to give my kids $200 each every month, to save up.

I said they have saving plans. That will be sufficient. I insisted they are well taken care of.

Hours later, she's back at the same topic, with the real reason: "Since I'm now staying with you, expenses will increase. I've decided to stay on. Other people will gossip if I move out. This should help with utility bills."

So she has decided to stay.

I can't ask her to leave. I can't ask my hubby to suggest she doesn't make our place her permanent home. He will not ask her to reconsider.

The decision is final. So convenient.

She was the one who insisted she wants to have her own place. Then she's worried about gossips now.

Frankly, I'm depressed by her decision. I really am not prepared to stay with her.

I hate it that we are now back in Singapore with the mums interfering in even the most subtle ways, the things we do with our kids.

But we HAD a home to return to, where the kids gets adjusted back to rules and regulations.

The home is no longer mine. I either voice out my displeasure and risk being labelled as a difficult DIL or suffer in silence.

I prefer no sweeping at home and did tell her but she insisted she prefers to sweep. Despite me telling her that ER has sensitive airways and is prone to bronchitis.

And how carelessly she held the spoon with the back sticking out and barely missed poking ER in the eye........my heart almost jumped out. Thank God for protecting my boy!

And how we've been taking turns to have diarrhoea (even AN who hardly complains about stomachache...)

And how I see puddles of water in the kitchen from who-knows-where.

And how she hangs those clothes in the drying rack overhead with clothes stuck at odd edges and then they go out of shape.

So many differences. I'm difficult. I'm a perfectionist in this sense. I want my home to be the way I want it to be.

I no longer can.

She wants to help. It's goodwill. But then what do I do? How do I get my neat, dry, whatever-sparkled-must-sparkle, pest-free environment back?

I don't have to like it. I just have to take it. It's unfair to me. Why do I have to? Why must I be made to choose between living in agony or telling the truth about how I feel. Obviously, I can only be truthful in my blog. I can never tell her "I don't want to live under the same roof as you."

So even if someone asked me for my opinion, I won't tell the hurtful truth.

Stupid Judy. You deserve to have things happen to you because you are a coward.