AN Prays

She knows who to go to for second opinion.

"Dear Lord Jesus, can I do something else? Mummy wants me to sleep but I don't feel sleepy...."


About praying for safety.

"Dear Lord Jesus, thank You for not letting me knock my head today. Do you know, I knocked my head yesterday and it's still painful......."


After praying, she told me she got punished by her chinese teacher today because she talked in class.

AN: "Teacher made me stand in the holy hood."

Me: "The what?"

AN: "Holy hood."

Me: "What does a holy hood do?"

AN: "It's the thing people put around their waist and then shake."

Oh. Hula hoop.

Just those 5 mins were enough to give me cramps from laughing. Lol!

Dog Welcomes Home Soldier...Again

This made me cry. Chucky (the dog in the video) behaves like Baileys.

Everyday in the past, whenever Mr Liow came home from a trip, that would be how Baileys would greet him. Almost identical jumps, licks and exact excitement.

Baileys, do you feel excited still? I miss you and I'm not happy having to miss you. I want to hold you. I want to smell you. I'm sorry baby. I really hope you are happier than I ever will be...

FUN FRIDAY

TGIF! Fridays are almost always happy and to make it even more fun for the kids, we decided to all sleep in the living room! Yeah! The kids get to leap off the couch right onto their bed (something they do not get to do during any other days. In fact, this is probably the first time they get to do that at home)

 

 And then they get to stare at the TV till 11pm.

 The sleep in the living room would have been fun but something wasn't right:

ER, as with every other nights, had to walked around before he slept. Instead of being confined in the room, he had the whole big living room to roam and he happily did. I had to catch him back so many times I was totally shagged out but he wasn't. I had to keep bringing him back to the bed to lay him down and that made him rather unhappy. Not quite our intention. Supposed to be Fun Friday.

He had a good time imitating his sister, rolling and jumping off the couch and on the mattress. Lots of giggles and he did look happy (before I had to terminate the fun at 11.30pm, way way way past bed time. For the sake of Fun Friday). I think he was over simulated. Plus, because we didn't have curtains put up, it was bright. Not ideal in inducing sleep.

AN, on the other hand, was able to lie down. BUT she took a long time to fall asleep as well!

She talked and talked and giggled happily. I know, very happy. But if she doesn't sleep, the little one will not. He LOVES to play with her and will attempt to wake her up even if she's already asleep. AN being awake meant ER will be too.

She finally fell asleep (before ER did). But the whole night, she kept kicking me! OMG. I couldn't sleep the whole night! The moment I drifted off, she would kick me. And she kept on kicking! I pushed her closer to Mr Liow (haha! Sorry dear!). Mr Liow had fallen alseep LONG before the kids did. He was tired. hehe. So I thought he probably wouldn't feel AN kicking him. For some reasons, AN continued to kick me. *sob* And each time she kicked me, I would turn to her and try to wake her up. Then I realised she didn't seem to be sleeping well. Her dreamy eyes were open occassionally when I turned to check on her. Couldn't tell if she was awake or asleep, but her eyes were opened, just dreamy.

Conclusion: Fun Friday can be fun in other ways. Sleeping out will be fun in the future when ER is older and no longer walks around before sleeping. Either that, or NO TV BEFORE BEDTIME!! OH MY GOODNESS...THIS IS THE FIRST TIME I HAD A TASTE OF OVERSIMULATION TO THE MAX!!!

Days of the Week

AN had been practising writing her days of the week for months. It's been hard getting her to remember which was which day.

Then, like how she got potty trained 2.5 years ago, she suddenly got it. For a while, I can't believe how she just wasn't able to remember. I didn't expect her to spell. I only thought she should just recognise and know which word is which.

Then soon after, with Mr Liow prompting her to spell them out loud, she is now able to spell them out verbally (only Monday-Friday). Writing them out still confuses her to a certain extent. See the little mistakes with caps and small letters. And when she verbally spells Friday, she does it right. When writing it, she keeps adding in a letter "s".

Good enough.

Good job, baby.

Home Hubby

For the whole week when I was having fever, Mr Liow had to prepare AN for school.

He made her milk (he has been making her milk whenever I'm not able to do it even before I was unwell), brushed her teeth, changed her and tied her hair.

I was impressed last evening when I saw him getting her scrunchies and pulling her hair back into a ponytail. He said he learnt to do it THAT week.

I challenged him to tie braids and he said he would learn.

By sleeping time, I saw him meddling with AN's hair. He did a braid!

He said he consulted youtube. Hehe.

Thanks for being involved in matters concerning the kids. I will aim to earn double your pay so you can finally get your turn to stay home with the kids soon ok? Hehe.

Sleeping Beauty After a Week

One Week ago: http://littleflowertwointow.blogspot.com/2012/03/sleeping-beauty.html

People age, beauty fades. Even pretty princess ballons suffer the same fate. This is Sleeping Beauty, deflated. Check out AN's expression. hehe. AN learns about the kiss of life then AN resuscitates the princess.

(Now my pictures can't be aligned...I'm using the new blogger. Anyone knows how I can convert back to old blogger?)

Dating

Mr Liow took a day off work to spend time with me yesterday. He asked me what I want for my birthday but I have nothing that I want or need. I said I feel happy whenever I have him by my side and he granted my wish. Heh!

We left ER with my mum before our program. He didn't cry after me when I left and when I asked for a goodbye kiss, he gave me one through the gate. It was easy. I REALLY can set my heart at ease to start work! Judy, stop procrastinating again.

Mum said he was a total angel. She brought him out for a walk at the mall and he was very obedient. He held her pants when she had to dig into her bag for something, held her hands when they walked, sat still in the LRT. He was extremely easy. Doesn't really sound like MY ER who wants to walk everywhere without looking back to see if we are following, wants to stand on his own in the LRT. He's not easy to bring out, in my opinion. I guess the theory that kids behave worse when their mum is around holds true, at least for me...Even Mr Liow thinks ER was well behaved last Sunday during AN's lesson when he sat still in the stroller throughout the whole hour of my absence. ER will NEVER sit in the stroller with me in sight! WHY huh? Sigh..

Anyway,

We went to St.Hilda's to submit application for alumni first. I hope the application goes through. The only proof I have that I was from with SHPS is my PSLE cert. But there's no mention that I had been with them since Ceylon Rd days before the shift to Tampines. I don't have my report books anymore. To qualify for Alumni, I need to proof I was a St.Hildian from day 1.

:(

 I like how security is so tight in schools these days. With all the news about kidnapping, I feel better knowing it won't be that simple for anyone to step into the school to bring my kids away. We then went to Vivocity for John Carter (the movie)! Just the two of us! We had popcorn, sugar coated peanut, hotdog bun and drinks. We held hands and shopped aimlessly (pure luxury!). We didn't have to rush, we didn't have to carry a big bag of necessities or push the stroller. I carried a wristlet and didn't have to spend 10 mins looking for my phone and wallet among the deep ocean of things the kids need. For once, I didn't have to be concerned about the kids' behaviour. I felt lighter, as if I had a very heavy bag lifted off me. I stayed frustration-less for that free hours.

But as a mum, I guess we appreciate moments like these as bonuses, on top of being blessed with the joy the kids bring (let's not go into the tantrums at this point. hehe). At the end of the day, this instinct tells us we miss the kids and despite enjoying every single bit of the freedom, we look forward to having the kids back by our side.

 Dear, thanks for taking this day off specially for me. Thanks for including my family in your plans. Thanks for always being around and for always changing to be the better dad and hubby that you aim to be. Thanks for being understanding towards my frustrations and listening to my complaints. I can ask for no better man and I thank God that you are mine. If you are serious about giving me a birthday gift and for not getting one this year (and the many many years after), I want to ask for a big one. So you have to promise that I will not be left alone when we grow old, and you shall not leave before me. Deal. (This is not a question) ;p

 Love you dear!

 Some pictures to remember:

Mr Liow's Rare Attempt at Drawing Characters in Bold 

AN drew me this. With a stencil. hehe.

Another gift from my baby: hand 'painting'

My Cake. Mr Liow asked for 'that many' candles but the lady only gave us 2 large ones and 2 small ones. It's a compliment to me! muahaha!

Years ago, my baby girl sat behind the birthday cake thinking we were singing a birthday song to her. Now she helps with the candles and sings me the song!

This year, the little one also participate, by clapping and cheering!

Mr Liow on our way for the rare rare date! Been a while since I have spare hands to take a picture of my man. hehe.

I am blessed but many times, I forget. 

p.s.: The white border around the pictures are rather...ugly unsightly...How do I not have that?? hmm..

There's a Snail in My Dumpling!

AN was eating her 粽子 halfway when she dropped her fork in disgust: "Eeks! There's a snail in my food!"

Hahahaha!

WE've had rare complaints of hair, cockroaches, ants and other tiny harmless (but nevertheless, disgusting) stuff found in food served outside since we were young.

Snail in food is something new.

We looked. It was a chestnut.

Sleeping Beauty

We took AN to watch Lorax last weekend and she totally loved the show. ER too. We can start watching movies with both kids more now. ER wasn't able to keep still for his first Happy Feet 2 movie but we can now all watch in peace together.

Now, whenever AN sees trees being felled, she'll look sad and asks why these people have to do that. The forestation we see from our kitchen is partially gone and she starts talking about it whenever I look out of our window. What choice do we have? Singapore is so small but populated. Housing is a necessity.

She came home one day, telling me that papers come from trees (and how trees prevent erosion..I'm impressed. Hehe.) I took the chance to remind her not to waste paper products.

So anyway, after the movie, she was character-balloons and got one.

She took this of me and Sleeping Beauty.

Poor AN

Part 1
Mr Liow was watching ER while I was doing some toilet business on Tuesday night. Unknowing to Mr Liow, ER managed to grab a pencil and accidently scratched AN on the hand. AN cried in pain.

The next day (yesterday when MR Liow dropped AN off in school), Miss Sue spoke to Mr Liow: "Adrielle asked me to inform you not to let her little brother play with her pencils because he doesn't know what he's doing and will hurt her with it."

Never discipline your parents. Get your teacher to do it.

hahahah!


Part 2
AN was bored at my mum's and I didn't go to their place yesterday. Mum took out the HEllo Kitty dolls we have at their place to keep her entertained. The dolls were kept in ziplock bags and mum accidentally scratched her with a sharp corner of the bag at the same location where ER scratched her with the pencil.

She went "OUCH! Popo! Why did you scratch me too? ER scratched me, now you...."

She then went on to complain to my mum how ER scratched her with the pencil 2 nights ago. hehe.


Poor AN and her injured arm. hehe.

How Should I Bore a Toddler?

It's more than an hour past bedtime. AN is asleep but ER is still walking around. I'm pretending to sleep, hoping that will bored him enough to feel sleepy.

It worked: he is so bored he played peekaboo with his shadow on the wall and now, my knee by pulling the bottom of my pants down and then up to my knee with a "boo" and giggle.

Baby, do you ever feel bored?

What Every Dad Should Know About His Daughter

Taken from:

http://blog.faithpromise.org/2012/01/fathers-be-good-to-your-daughters/

Last week I was dropping my daughter off for a birthday party.  As I was leaving a man stopped me asking for direction.  He was standing with one of my daughter’s school friends.  Immediately recognizing her I put my hand out and introduced myself explaining that our daughters sit together at lunch often.  His reaction was sarcastic as he gave his daughter a side-ways glance.  

I didn’t fully catch what he said but whatever it was it didn’t honor his daughter in any way.  Looking at her I could tell this was not abnormal behavior.

I’ll be honest… I wanted to punch him.

It’s challenging to articulate the influence a father has on a little girl.  How much of his attitude and actions toward her can determine her future relationships.  I remember how much stock I placed in what my dad thought of me.  I remember how much I wanted him to be proud of me.  To affirm me.  To show me my value.

I remember how he would brag about me on the sidelines of the soccer field.

How he would tell me I’m beautiful.

How he would hug me so hard I couldn’t breath.

How often he reminded me as a teenager, “Never date a boy you wouldn’t marry.”

(What a way to narrow the playing field!)

Dad’s, don’t lose sight of the impact you have today on your daughter’s future.  Here are three things I encourage you to focus on:

Affirm Her

She looks to you for affirmation, encouragement, & guidance.  As she grows through puberty (ESPECIALLY, as she grows through puberty), she needs your voice reminding her that she is beautiful, valuable and worthy of love.  If she can learn to believe you, then she’ll believe her future husband when he tells her the same things.

Set the Standard

Be the husband you want her to have one day. Enough said.  Is it difficult?  Yes.  Does it mean sacrifice?  Yes.  Is it worth it?  Yes.  I watch my husband daily making changes to be a better husband and dad.  He’s amazing.  He demonstrates for our daughter the kind of man he wants her to marry one day.

Talk About the Standard

Talk about the future.  As you “Imagine the End” and think about the man you hope she marries… talk about it!  Let her know what you expect.  Set the bar.  She’ll do everything she can to jump over it.

Let me level with you, dad.  The more you affirm her today, the less she’ll seek affirmation in some teenage boy later.

AN Night Potty Trained

I haven't been bringing AN to toilet at night since I fell sick and Mr Liow only managed to bring her the first couple of nights because he couldn't get up. Lol!

For the whole month with the exception of a few days when she would wake me up, even with milk right before bedtime and no waking up to pee, she didn't wet herself.

She had woken me up probably twice in this 1 month to tell me she was urgent.

I think she has crossed this milestone.

Next up is to train her to sleep back in the dark... Since MIL came to start during weekends, she started asking me why I allow ourselves to sleep in the dark. She repeatedly without fail, emphasized that the kids would be scared.

Thanks to her, AN finally got convinced that there has to be monsters in a dark room because nai nai says it's scary without lights. Since a year ago, I had to have lights on for her...

AN had slept 4 years without lights at night and would have continued because we never made her wonder if the dark is fearful..

Now, I just have to undo it...I wonder if it makes her happy now, knowing that AN finally fears the dark, just like her.

ER @ 18 Months

Another one about his growth, habits and likes at 18 month.

Speech

In addition to what he was able to say in my previous update, here are more words in his vocab bank that he's now saying:

1) Woof woof dog - at cows, cats and dogs. He thinks they are the same animal.

2) Walk walk (more on this later)

3) Hot - I allow him to feel my warm drinks and he goes "hot". Recognizes higher temperature now.

4) Nice - at food he tries and likes. He leans forward after acknowledging with a "nice" and goes "um!"

5) Book. Read. - he fetches me books to be read to

6) Poop - he informs after he poops while touching his diaper

7) Poot - This comes with a cheeky smile. He tells on anyone who farts by pointing to that person with that cute announcement.

8) Shawah - Shower. He grabs his top and smiles because he loves to take showers and baths (hardly any bath now). And he takes his diapers off.

9) Litta birdie - little birdie. HIS little birdie. Hehe. It's hard to keep him lying down for diaper change and the only thing that he gets to look at without being thrown away in retaliation, is his buddy. During each 'meeting' (shower or diaper change), he'll go "litta birdie" by pointing at it and smiling cheekily. Hehe.

10) Oil Oil - the ru yi yiu that we put on their belly after shower and before sleep. He used to be allergic to it when younger but is less so now. And he loves that cool tinkling feel on his skin like his sister does.


Physical

He is walking faster now, sometimes attempting to run after AN

Attempts to jump but without his legs off the ground much yet.

Climbs up high places like his high chair; crosss hurdles like piles of clothes; hangs off almost anything within his reach, like the railing in our lift, the handle in the car, the handrails above our heads in buses and trains. He's a monkey in disguise.

He's nodding now. Prior to nodding, he shakes his head to everything, even if it's a "yes" to our questions. And because it makes me shriek "so cute!", he's doing that often, accompanied with his cheeky grin.


Behavior

Lies down for oil when I announce that it's time.

Likes to go for walks, so much he refuses to walk anywhere near lifts during walks. He's starting to show his unwillingness to step into the lift by struggling now.

He sits down to check his feet whenever he thinks he stepped on something.

Goes "eeeeeee" in disgust at random flying dust bunnies or hair

Keeps things away, mostly in the right places. Even if I put stuff away from their original position, he'll put them where they first belonged.

Chooses his own drinking bottle

Has specific preferences:

- likes an orange oval shape and is able to find the shape among many other shapes in the shape sorter to successfully put it back.

- likes a particular book from each area (bookcase, toy container, coffee table) and will without fail take that few books out to be read to.

likes to play with balls and push toy cars

so friendly...he speaks to people on public transport and singles out individuals to chit chat with. Some shy strangers smile politely but my boy doesn't get the idea that they don't understand baby language.

still loves to smile. Love love LOVE the cheekiness to bits!


He was so grouchy when he was sick. His cough is getting better and it's about time! It's ONE MONTH since he started coughing...

But it's all passing, hopefully. His cheery self is back now. I missed his cheekiness!

Disney on Ice

AN's school was closed last Friday and I almost forgot! Thank goodness there was a reminder slip in her greenbook.

Mr Liow came home in the afternoon. It was our long awaited DISNEY ON ICE day!

AN had been counting down, from "Mummy, today is Monday. 1, 2, 3, 4. 4 days to Friday!" with the help of her fingers, to "yeah! It's finally Friday!" in the morning before the show.

AN was sooooo into the show that she forgot she wanted popcorn. And when it was toilet break, she twirled and whirled, hopped and skipped, took my hands and danced with me all the way up the steps and to the restroom.

She cheered, screamed and moved with the music. It was a joy to watch her so into the mood. I wondered if she would be happier learning to dance instead of music. Maybe I should start looking out for concerts so that she can see her future in music and I can observe if she's as interested in music.

ER was sooooo excited as well! He jumped up and down while seated on Mr Liow's laps, clapped and cheered at the end of each segments and turned to 'talk' to Mr Liow and I as if he was telling us what he thought. We didn't understand him, but from his body language, he was singing praises.

2 hours flew by and soon the show was over. Both of them were smiling and clapping and moving to the music even till the very end as we waited for the crowd to leave before we made our way out. AN couldn't bear to leave, so we stayed behind a little so that she could continue to soak in the atmosphere and music.

This is money well spent! Much much better than Mickey Music Festival in November in our opinion but to AN, every Disney show is PERFECT.

She's 5 years...is she too late for dance? I think she'll love to be able to dance, my little performer at heart.

:)

Little Organizer

My little boy had a habit: he likes to categorize stuff.

I had just finished reading to him a book and he wandered off. I thought he was going to get me more books to read and he returned with 3. Then he went back to get the box that used to contain those 3 books, came back, and tried stuffing those books back into the box. I had taken them out and placed then in the toy container filled with books for their convenience.

He didn't appreciate the convenience and thinks they should go back to where they rightfully belong. Hehe.

What's in my ear?

AN had been complaining of a popping sound in her right ear last Friday. I was worried about an ear infection but decided to wait and see if it would go away by Saturday.

It didn't go away but instead, starting causing her pain when she yawned and chewed. Mr Liow took her to a doctor and this was what the visit returned us: a tiny something that no one could guess what it was.

According to Mr Liow, the doctor put a scope into her ear. She bravely kept still but the doctor scraped the sides of her ear (I don't know exactly which side but according to daddy again, it wasn't anywhere bad enough to cause her to lose hearing). She started bawling (and bleeding) when that happened but stopped after she received a giant Strawberry Shortcake sticker for her bravery.

She had no idea what that was and was very sure she didn't put anything into her ear. Neither did she allow anyone to do that. I'm very certain she wouldn't do either.

How did that get in? My guess was, this was stuck to her finger without her,knowing and her ear itched at that wrong moment. Must have dropped in when she scratched her ear. Just a wild guess.

Dr said it was good we brought her in this soon. Some kids came in months later, after the ear got infected.

Ouch.... I'm thankful, very very thankful AN was spared that sort of agony (recalling that excruciating pain in my ears during the flight to Hongkong) This is something I'd hope all little children need NEVER to experience.

He gave us a bottle of antibiotics in case of an infection. I am not going to use it on her unless necessary. Till today, her ears seem fine. Again, thank God!

Why are we prescribed antibiotics so much? That's probably the only 'cure' for infections, but I thought studies are showing that bacterias are stronger these days because of the increased usage of antibiotics right?

Sigh...

Either way, I'm going pray for them a lot. Superbugsor not, I just pray they will continue to grow stronger against every new "hateful whatever" they sample along the way.

Suddenly Asleep

This little boy refused to sleep and I couldn't make him, so I allowed him to explore.

AN was already asleep. ER, with my little pillow in hand, trotted to his sleeping sister and laid his head comfortably right next to hers.

Then he started making his way to the abandoned baby cot and flipped around on it.

In less than a minute, he became still. I didn't want to disturb him and started playing THE drawing game. After one round, I went to check on him. He was fast asleep!

How I wish he can go to sleep on his own every night!

AN had been wishing too. Every once in a while, she will tell me she wished ER wouldn't need me to sleep with him soon. Then he can go sleep with daddy and she can have me back again.

"Girls sleep with girls and boys sleep with boys." AN's theory.

I have to constantly update her that the very day ER starts being able to sleep by himself, that will be the day I go back to sleep on my own big and comfy bed with daddy.

She goes "huh" in disappointment everytime we talk about this but she's not giving up trying to talk me into her ideal "girls with girls and boys with boys" sleeping arrangement.

The Imagination

AN had been singing a song from the Little Einstein program. It goes something like "open the door, we wanna come in. open open open open open open open."

After I was done showering her, I put the towel back on the rack while she continued singing.

After she finished the song, she smiled and said: "Mummy, the little einsteins sang the song to open their door but it doesn't work on our door."

It's interesting how shows blow up kids' imagination, only to have them realise reality is not as interesting.

Anyway, I asked her to sing again and secretly unlatched the door so that it swung open after her song. She was caught by surprise for a bit before going :"Mummy, I know you opened the door." And we had a good laugh over that little 'trick'.

I Don't Love AN Enough

She deserves more than I can give...

Many times, this 5 year old needs constant reminders. Sometimes she forgets. When she forgets even after the many reminders, I get frustrated.

And for forgetting, she sometimes suffer even without the need to be punished.

I'm becoming an angry person. Sometimes I wonder why I have to he nice to others when not everyone puts in effort to be kind.

With that evil thought I plant, unknowingly I train myself to become cruel and heart hearted.

And when AN slipped and fell, I got frustrated instead of protective. My instinct wasn't to pick her up and comfort her. I even spanked her for crying in pain.

What an ass I'm becoming.

After cooling down, I hugged her and heard what she had to tell me. She didn't slip because she had been running. She only knew it was slippery and she couldn't stop herself from falling.

:(

And I spanked her for something she didn't have control over.

Maybe I am no more of a human than her, whose ways I hate. I'm becoming more and more like her.

I refuse to be. I REFUSE TO BE!

I will not hurt my baby. I will protect my baby. I will be slow to anger. I will listen before reacting. I will not react in anger. I will not let evil encroach me. I refuse to be affected by evil ways.

I REFUSE THE HOLD OF THE ONE TO WHOM I DO NOT BELONG.

The Lord made me a mum to protect, love and serve my children, a wife to bring comfort to my husband.

I DO NOT BELONG TO THE DARK. So, I'm stepping out. I do not wonder why I need to be kind to the unkind. I only need to remember that me and my household serves the Lord.

Judy, remember.

Coughing ER

He's been coughing for 3 days now.

From the very first sign of his bronchitis till now, it's almost a month. And we are still battling. There had been recovery, and then relapses. He's more often unwell than well.

At times, I'm resigned to what comes along. But when it happens too often, I feel terribly unjustified that my kids have been suffering to be strong. WHEN WILL THEY BE STRONGER?

Non stop. Just has to keep happening, right?

And during times like these, please spare us empty rubbish noises like: "you should be thankful you have your mother and mother in law to help you. When I was a young mum, I had no mother in law to help and my mum was far away."

Empty vessels make the most noises. Apparently, they really do.

I am thankful for my mum during the 2 weeks of my fever and recovery. Extremely thankful!

But, did she mention "Mother in law's help"? I should be thankful? Serious? Thankful for which type of help? Was there even any? I had seen enough of her tantrums, even during the most difficult 2 weeks when she was more busy pretending to be nice and helpful outside than being around at home. At home, she had only sarcastic comments to make about herself being noble without help with kids and I had the whole world to help me.

Don't come if you don't feel like coming! What's with the sarcasm? I rested because those medicines made,me drowsy! Seriously, go away! No, really! GO AWAY!

She should be thankful she had no mother in law. She can get along with NO ONE, not her daughter, not us, not even friends whom she hates when they do not agree with her. What makes her think she will appreciate the mother in law she never had?


Selfishness is deep. It grows with roots deeply embedded in one's character and it's not hard to recognize a selfish person when you are staring at one in the face.

Before you start preaching to me about "being thankful for my mother in law's help", please also indicate what sort of help you mean. I was so sick I must have missed it!

Trash comments that do nothing to help during these periods when my kid (thank God only ONE of them) is unwell as of now only serves to make family hate you more.

Have I hated anyone more? Why must you be so special? Why do you have such a special place in my heart? I've never dared put anyone there and you just keep finding your way there......

Go away. I hate you, virus, cough, phlegm, mucus, and you who only knows how to use words to make life hell for people whom you claim to love.

When will you stop all your nonsense and start using your heart like human do?

Procrastinator

There seems to be a hundred and one things I want to do but 2 years later, I still have not done anything.

I have canine shampoos that BM will no longer be using. I need to sell or give away but they are still here.

I have elevated pet diners that I bought extras of, to sell when we come back. They are still here. And dog houses for tiny dogs that I thought we could easily sell away.

I have Coach wristlets that friends asked me to help get. Some came for them, others I can't remember who. Now I still have.

I bought clothes for AN. Too much! Now I need to find time to sort, give and sell.

Time whizzed past. I realized I'm blissfully overwhelmed by my kids. I am constantly worrying about those stuff we brought back to sell but since ER came, I couldn't even take pictures in peace.

If we ever go back again (Mr Liow aiming for the position that requires him to be there end 2014), I promise never to buy like a gu gu woman anymore.

First timer me blindly follow. The wives buy I buy. But really, no matter how cheap these things are, we won't need sooooo many! And I hope by then when both kids are older, I will have more time to pay attention to who asked me to buy what so that I don't end up with things that I didn't want in the first place.

I'm so messed up.

I missed BM. I am looking forward to visit them but we have not. We have not :(

Why is one more baby sooooo time and attention consuming? Why do I feel so lost? Why are my thoughts all over the place? Why havent I been able to do the thousand and one things I had been dying to do? I'm just a robot doing the same thing over and over again. When will I break out of it?

Reunion of the Potatoes

Mr Potato was from Florida. He had been living a lonely, solitary life for the past 3 years since we brought him home to Singapore..

Finally in Hkg, Mr Liow decided to look for Mrs Potato, because it's not good for potatoes to be alone. He found her and now the potatoes are reunited.

All bespectacled potatoes, gather!

Lost almost 4kg

In 7 days, I lost 4 kg. Time to pile them back on from today! Mum will continue to make me plain food today. I'll be good and listen, get my health back before I go on a chilli feast soon.

My Little Angel

AN saw me taking clothes down from the drying poles and grabbed them from me before running off with them. She likes to help me with selective chores and this is one. She likes to help me clip them to the poles as well, before I put them up to air dry.

After collecting them all, she sat herself beside all these clothes and singlehandedly folded every piece!

I was so proud of her and told her so. She replied: "Mummy, I do this because I love you."

More than just pride, I felt so loved too. Not forgetting Mr Liow helped me put the clothes in the machine up to air dry.

Recovering

Fever hasn't gone too high today. Was 37.9°c at most, even without fever relief.

Took another 2 panadols, zyrtec and amoxicilin and am ready to hit the sack.

I feel less fatigue than yesterday, except when the drowsiness from mefanamic acid kicked in this morning.

Mr Liow attended music class with AN today. He resigned to having no other choice and jeered at himself: "I'm going to be the clown again today." Lol! He feels awkward doing the childish actions with AN and is not very familiar with the routines because I attend class with AN usually.

This weekend just brought our relationship to another low with MIL. I was spared her unreasonable and insensitive comments because I was in bed whenever she was around (and she was around only near bedtime....). Mr Liow was so constantly challenged by her criticism it cost him much energy just to not respond.

To not help a single bit, that's bad enough. She had to make unreasonable comments about me resting 'too much'. Mr Liow was offended and reminded her that I was having fever, 6th day and taking medicines that cause drowsiness...he didn't want to say more.

Mr Liow suffered this week. He had to run a one man show without me. I think I'm recovering. I hope the fever leaves by tomorrow so I can continue to perform my duties and he can relax.

I am recovering.

I am craving

I need curry....

I need nasi lemak with the sambal chilli...

Omgoodness.....I've not tasted anything near spicy for 6 days......

I KNOW! THAT'S WHY I'M NOT RECOVERING! I'VE NOT HAVE CHILLI FOR 6 AGONIZING DAYS!

Sob.....life is miserable without chilli..... :(

Allergy??

What on earth is wrong with me???

Fever not going away. Now I'm getting hives again. Because of Amoxicilin? In all my 33 years of life, I'm pretty sure I've had it before with no known allergy.

What is wrong?

Just stop already.

Angels

My mum had been coming over to help this past week since my fever started, or even if not here, she came to bring ER to her place.

Because it's weekend, mum knows her place. She is just a maternal grandma, and weekend doesn't belong to her.

But not as if it mattered to the paternal grandma...she went out from morning and is still not back yet. But she made porridge for us and kids before she left. I must learn to be thankful.

Most of all, I have to credit Mr Liow. I had been sleeping a lot since last night. The cough syrup made me so drowsy I had thrown up 3 times already :( I'm not going to take any more of it.

That's not the point.

The point is, Mr Liow could fill the gap I left now that I'm constantly bedridden. He changed the kids, bathed AN, fed ER, got groceries, and kept them occupied so that I could rest. I was sleepy the whole day despite my last cough syrup dosage taken at 6am this morning. That strong huh??

I dozed off while he went to get us dinner.

He made me come into the room to sleep, but I'm not sleepy now. But I'm lying down. Fever still at 38.4°C before panadol. Took so much pills my saliva tastes bitter now. :(

The bitter tastes in my mouth makes me gag.

And because I'm lying down in the room, he's alone with the kids. He's handling them so well, no tears, no struggles.

AN was an angel too. I was drifting in and out of sleep while Mr Liow was out getting dinner. I saw her watching over ER, carrying him off the sofa when he was dangerously near the edge, she packed the coffeetable and didn't just chuck those books and toys away. She put them into their appropriate containers and shelves. And then she gave ER water to drink after opening the cover so that ER could sip, and then she drank her own water.

She then came to sit beside me, and patted me rhythmically.

I could see everything she did but I had no energy to pluck myself out before drifting asleep again.

My angels. I'm thankful for people who love me.

This is day 5 of fever and it still goes up to mid 38 when fever relief wears off..what can this be?

Another Doctor Visit

Day 4 and fever still high. Mr Liow insists I go see a doctor because it's not normal.




Dr recommended I alternate panadol with mefanamic to keep my fever under control. If in 3 days' time, fever is still high, he'll need to put me through further tests.

And I got antibiotics for throat infection.

Times like these, I'm super thankful it's me instead of the kids.

38.9°c still?

Today and day 4 and I'm still burning?

Mum and Mr Liow says I should get a thorough check up. But I thought I'd just finish the chinese medicine before seeking a second opinion. I mean, the chinese physician is also a doctor. It's just not easy to completely trust her because this is my first go with tcm.

Probably if I'm still burning tomorrow (that will be the 5th day of fever), I'll go do a thorough check up.

Update about AN:

She is fine. -_____-"

She was nauseous and had tummyache in the morning yesterday, partly coz she started coughing badly the night before and she didn't have enough rest.

While Mr Liow was changing her back to pjs (she was in uniform and ready for school), she was all chirpy and talkative.

He whatsapped me saying that he thinks she "chao geng" (pretended to be sick). But we agreed that the nauseous part can't be faked and she had an enjoyable time at home. She had so much time she kept working on her addition, so much so that she can mentally add 1 to any numbers up to 30 in an instant. Nothing much, but it's a great deal to me. Hehe. Early this year, she needed her fingers to count.

Mum came to cook for us. She brought her barangs (pan, stirer). After cooking for 2 years in Tucson, I've come to understand why mum is always saying she can't cook with unfamiliar tools. Because although I had ample practice and could whip up a feast there, I made yucky mac and cheese when I cooked my first dish here. Hehe.

I'm so thankful for mum. She's around to help, so Mr Liow could focus on work. He was worried and came hm to check on me, and drove me to the doctor. He said he'd be home earlier but because I'm being taken care of, he didn't have to.

She's coming over again to cook and clean today. And mum leaves my kitchen sparkling clean! Hehe.

ER is still sleeping. I'm gg to rest a little more too.

Persistent Fever

It peaked at 39.1°C after my nap but went down to a stable 37.8°c since I popped a panadol at about 5.30pm.

Did a search on persistent high fever with no other symptoms and got "it may be a first sign of cancer".

Hehe (insert nervously laughter)

Back From Eu Yan Seng

Physician didn't say much and I didn't know what to ask except if I can consume panadol with their prescription. I can, as long as they are at least 2 hours apart. She suggested I continue with panadol only IF my fever goes beyond 38.5°c, which was what I had already been doing. So it's not a taboo for Eastern prescriptions to meet Western medicines. At least not in my case.



I was given 5 days' worth of herbal powder, 2 doses daily. Have taken one dose. I like! Yummy. I like how it tastes a little like the Pagoda herbal powder in tiny metal containers for diarrhea.

There is no indication of what the powder is made up of, so I can't find out what I'm putting in my stomach.

And for that, I'm 53$ poorer. I hope that's good investment. 

Mum has a chinese sinseh to recommend and Barley's mummy too. If this one at EYS doesn't work for me, I know where next to try.

Ok, nap time...wonder if the concoction helps with reducing fever..hmm...