Brainless or pure selfish

She has something on today.

GO AHEAD! I'M NOT EVEN CONCERNED WHERE SHE'S GOING.

Then she asks: "You bringing the kids to the wake?"

"yes". (isn't it obvious?)

She goes on: "With the kids, how can you even do anything?"

"I'll not participate in the rituals if they are fidgety."

Then the ultimate brainless comment comes: "It's so tough. You might as well not go." (Her exact words for your interpretation in case I misunderstood her kind intentions: "很辛苦。你不如不去.")

I don't care if she meant well. Asking a mourner to not be present won't sound right, no matter how she puts it. Unreasonable!

I replied her: "This is my grandfather. Even if I can't participate, I want to be present."

I'm on the verve of blowing.....on the verge of raising my voice.

Dear, if u are reading this, I tolerate to not put u in a difficult position. I can't tell for how long more...

She offers to cancel her appointment for today. But I don't need her pity. My grandfather didn't die last night. She would have canceled it earlier if she sincerely cared.

I don't expect her to give up her time for me.

And I seriously do not appreciate selfish ideas at this point.

Someday, I'll shift out. After I'm financially independent, I'll shift out.

P.s: she came home by 6.15pm, minutes before we left. Don't know if she came home earlier on purpose or not but she commented in surprise when she saw us: "you are still home?"

I'm posting this assuming that she did come back earlier. Trying to convince myself there has to be some good in her.