Cant Bear

It's weekend and my dad packed my old keyboard so that we could bring it back home for AN to practise on. That was mine when I first started, meaning to say the keyboard is 25 years old! Lots of memories. Hehe.

Was feeling kind of sad when dad was packing it into its box. Dad loved to hear me play on my electone when I was young but I chose to give it up to concentrate on school.

Dad had been enjoying watching AN play on the keyboard lately (no music, just practicing "do, re and me" as homework) before I suggested bringing the keyboard back home for her to practice on.

I couldn't continue play for him and I couldn't let AN play for him long enough. :(

Mum reacted positively when I told her about the plan. She said she'd start looking for a job after we start the change. I thought about it and decided to start when AN starts K1 next year. Mum was giving AN routine hugs a while ago and casually commented that she will not be cooking for her when she starts N1. I am starting to miss coming over and watching AN bond with them.

My mum is a very proactive grandma. Probably not the best in the whole of Singapore but at least the better of the 2 that AN has. How so? Let's see:

1. My mum cooks and also finds time to bring AN out, to meet
my aunts, to the library, or simply window shopping or on LRT rides. She pushes ER for strolls with AN so I could bath.

2. Mum saves egg shells for AN everytime she makes egg dishes. And she showed AN how to use markers to draw on those shells. AN has since, made many egg faces! Simply adorable artwork!

3. Mum grows sprouts for AN after hers from school died.

4. Mum, on one of her trip with AN to library, borrowed a book from the library that teaches readers how to draw and drew with AN.

5. Mum made origami with AN with her limited knowledge of making any.

6. Mum sings with AN and listens to AN read.

7. Mum builds domino blocks for AN.

8. Mum playacts with AN! She feeds AN's imagination with imaginary scenarios.

9. I'm sure there are more I missed.

On the other hand, my MIL comes during weekends at her own convenience. When the whole lot of us were sick and Mr Liow told her so, she didn't even come earlier to help us. In fact, she came right when it was time to tuck the kids in on Friday night, spent the whole of that Saturday out and was hesitant when Mr Liow asked if she could stay home that Sunday, to help with ER while I brought AN for music class and Mr Liow was down with high fever. Very hesitant.

Mum made us herbal teas to cool us off when we were sick, MIL bought lots of durians and like she wasnt aware we were sick, said: "finish them, don't waste". Durians are yummy but no one takes them when sick...what was she thinking?

Mil never brings AN anywhere, not even to playground downstairs, she hogs the TV and AN has to wait a long long time for her turn, never does anything with AN. The only thing she does is read her newspapers and hogs the table with them after she's done, leaving lesser space for AN to doodle on.

When my mum comes over, she helps me with any housework she sees (laundry: the machine wash cycles, the hanging up and outside to dry till clothes are dried. She takes them down and folds them. Kitchen: cooking, wash and wipe whole kitchen spotlessly clean).

Mil only good at leaving sugar on tabletop to keep ants constantly visiting us, and coffeestains on coffee table without wiping. She's been coming every week since Oct but has never wiped anything in my house or even so much as glanced at my laundry basket or washing machine.

Mr Liow jokingly asked her to help mop our floor one day and she laughed. I laughed too and couldn't help blurting out: "You wait long long." And you guessed it: she didn't. Never did, never will. Even my dad helps me mop the floor when I nap with the kids for the few times we stay home.

How can mothers (and grandmas) be so different?

This is one reason why I feel so bad about having to change where we will be after AN gets off school. I want her to enjoy grandma (my mum) because this grandma puts in efforts in grandparenting her. Once mum starts working, she will see so little of AN.

As much as I can't bear to, I think the new arrangement will be better for all (and so mum and dad doesn't hv to see each other daily and get on each others' nerves). Just hope that mum will have accommodating working hours that allow her to come over to visit the kids often enough. Dad will help bring AN back, so AN will not lose a grandpa. Hehe.