Monday, January 6, 2014

Missing the big baby

This is her 3rd day in school and I'm missing her more each day.

Like the first time she attended preschool, I could feel her absence from home. I missed her more than I missed ER at every of such milestone. I can't explain why.

I cried the first few weeks when she left for school in the morning when she started attending Shekinah. I was on the verge of tears when I brought her home from there for the last time.

I was emotional on her first day at St. Hilda's.

Today is day 3 and I can't wait for her to come home. The past 2 mornings after she left in the school bus, I felt empty. It was the same today.

Not so much for ER. I was actually kinda excited that he's growing up. I was excited when he attended Shekinah in June last year. Maybe I should wait til he goes into Primary School too before I start comparing my emotions.

I would tell them I wish they remain in school when they simply refuse to cooperate at times. I don't mean it. I miss them when they are not around.

This is the agony of motherhood I guess. At least that's for me. I wish for my own freedom when they drive me up the wall and when I do get freedom, I await their return back home.

Quite unfair. Hmm. ....

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